Despite the barrage of TV programmes, films, books, newspaper articles etc advising us of the 1001 Things We Must Do Before We Die, there is more to life than an ongoing exercise of ticking boxes.
And despite the opening statement, I have just put a great big tick in the one box I never thought I would complete.
Since passing my driving test, my dream garage has consisted of:
Ford Granada MkI (as seen in The Sweeney (actually The Sweeney car was a Consul))
Ford Capri (as seen in Minder and The Professionals)
Lotus Esprit (as seen in The Spy Who Loved Me)
Triumph Stag (as seen on the driveway of my next door neighbour)
Mark 2 Jaguar (as seen in The Long Good Friday)
Without being specific, the one car marque that I've always wanted to own is a Jaguar.
The model is relatively unimportant, I just want to own a Jag.
And now I've got one.
And since taking delivery, I have been grinning like an imbecile - I still can't believe that I own a Jag.
If you're interested:
2005 X Type XS 2.0 Diesel
It a special edition version - it has 2 balaclavas in the glove box, and a sawn-off shotgun in the boot.
All Super Heroes have distinct abilities that separate them from normal mortals - hence the reason they are Super Heroes I suppose.
My Special Powers are:
Drink a pint of beer in 19 seconds
Eat a Jam Doughnut in 3 Bites
Ability to calculate Net Present Value
Understand the concept and application of binomial distribution
Rudimentary HTML
Memorised the following pointless trivia: * starting XI's for Aston Villa, Ipswich Town and Liverpool for the 1981/82 Season * the scorelines and starting line-ups for all FA Cup Finals from 1970 to 1990 * the catalogue numbers of Iron Maiden albums * the complete track listing of all Stiff Little Fingers albums
Apparently, none of the above makes me a Super Hero.
I freely admit it - I am a Luddite
The Product Diffusion Curve shows the different stages of product adoption:
I am happy in my position in the final 16%
Technology I own:
Desktop Computer
Things I don't own (which everyone else seems to, and no-one believes I can survive without):
Mobile Phone
iPod
Laptop
iPad / other Tablet PC
Facebook
Twitter
In this same category, I would include streamed/downloaded music - theres just something about the physical product I prefer.
As a result of this, I have been no more than a cursory user of Spotify. I don't doubt that it is indeed a revelation, having a virtually unlimited selection of tracks at your fingertips. And in a market where physical product is on the verge of dying out, this must surely be a cornerstone of any future model for the business called music.
But now I find myself spending more time listening on Spotify and creating & sharing playlists - why now?
Well its a long story (forgive the self indulgence in what follows):
This Year marks 25 years since I started my apprenticeship
40 blokes aged 16/17 (and one girl) thrown together in a lecture hall, destined to spend the next 4 years (at least) in each others company.
And so we did the "Forming, Storming, Norming" thing that Management Theory tells us about.
Distinct groups of people collecting together over shared common ground (football, music, comedy etc).
Whilst it might sound like a flimsy basis for a long term friendship, Ozzy Osbourne and Monty Python proved to be the commonality between me and my (soon to be) best mate ("best mate" sounds like a childish statement, but I really can't think of another term)
Friendship continued right through the Apprenticeship and beyond.
Around 1992, I had what can only really be described as a mid-life crisis (if it was a mid-life crisis, then my life span is only 44!) - I went off and got married. We remained in sporadic contact, meeting up for a chat/moan, going out for'Beer & Curry Nights', but as often happens, our lives drifted further apart.
Eventually, he moved to America and we completely lost touch, apart from the odd phone call.
Why did we lose touch? Despite my job title being Planning Manager, its quite shocking how dis-organised I am in my personal life, and the e-mails and phone calls that I fully intended to send never happened. And due to my refusal to sign-up to Facebook (on principle, but I can't remember what the principle is), there was no possibility of maintaining contact through that medium.
Well, thankfully, there are people in the world better at making phone calls than me, and my mate Skyped me just the other week ('Skyped' sounds like it should be followed by the phrase "Oo-Matron!")
So after a long chat about important stuff, and a healthy dose of inconsequential bollocks, we have re-established contact through the use of Spotify Playlists and supporting e-mails.
I've already sent and received a number of playlists, and have been introduced to some great stuff that seemed to have completely passed me by.
Top of the pile so far is 3 albums by Frank Turner
Frank Turner - Try This At Home
And to round off the self indulgence, this TV Theme (especially in its full length form) always seems to resonate.
By the way, I always thought I was Terry Collier. Turns out I'm actually Bob Ferris.
to paraphrase a cake advert: "Exceedingly Good Value".
I want to send a letter from London to Glasgow, and I would like it to be there the next day.
OK it might take 2 days, but its still a tad cheaper than me delivering it by hand (alternatively, I could just send an e-mail)
In spite of the price rise, the British Postal Service is the fifth cheapest (after Malta, Slovenia, Cyprus & Ireland), and is half the price of the equivalent First Class Post in Denmark, Italy, Germany & the Netherlands.
The percentage price rise of almost 25% will be the figure that is quoted in the news, but 60p is still a strikingly good price for the service
First Impressions: that is not how you spell "Sonic" - never mind, spell checking aside Paul Weller's new album is a thoroughly enjoyable way to spend 43.5 minutes* of your life.
It has been two years since 'Wake Up The Nation', the album that re-united Paul Weller and Bruce Foxton in the studio, and according to some critics was "a return to form". After the slightly disappointing '22 Dreams', it was a better album but still not as good as I hoped it would be. 'Stanley Road' is often cited as Paul Weller's best album/career high - to that I say: "pish - go away and listen to 'As Is Now'", but this new album ranks above 'Stanley Road' and 'Wake Up The Nation'.
For Trivia Lovers: 'Sonik Kicks' was released nearly 30 years to the day (give or take a week) since 'The Gift'
The album starts with a Neu!-ish/Krautrock-ish/Chemical Brothers-ish (lots of -ish there!) introduction (sadly, the first couple of seconds immediately reminded me of Paul McCartney's 'Wonderful Christmastime') , followed by half-spoken/half-sung Pop Art poetry/lyrics. A wave of psychedelia remains in this track - a fine start to the album.
'The Attic' is more familiar ground, and after 'Green' it is a welcome distraction. Whilst 'Green' is fine, I don't think I could manage two of them on the trot
'Kling I Klang' / 'Sleep Of The Serene' / 'By The Waters' - its difficult to know where one stops and the next starts, a sort of 3 tune song cycle without ever losing your attention.
'That Dangerous Age' - destined to be a proper Weller classic. Remember The Jam tracks 'Mr Clean' and 'Smithers-Jones' (OK, that was a Bruce Foxton song) - songs about not wanting to get caught in the Rat Race? 'The Dangerous Age' covers similar ground, but from the perspective of now "just getting on with it", and possibly the impending "mid life crisis"
'Study In Blue' - Starting as what can only be decided as a tender(ish) duet with wife Hannah, it rolls into a drawn out meditatory instrumental passage. Memories of The Style Council pervade this track. I never really liked The Style Council much, but I do like this track (note to self: go and listen to 'Cafe Bleu' again)
'Dragonfly' / 'Around The Lake' - both these songs are cut from similar cloth. A driving bass and drumbeat. To offer another comparison to the past, would sit nicely with Gift-era Jam, or the first knockings of The Style Council
When Your Gardens Overgrown - The most immediate track on the album. One that would not sound out of place tacked onto the end of "Heavy Soul"
You get 16 seconds of electronic noodling ('Twilight'), and then its straight into 'Drifters'. First impressions are a messy cacophony of bass, guitars & lyrics. Stick with it - it's a fine track, despite it not really having a discernible tune and the one that seems to have worked its way into my brain the quickest
'Paperchase' - It starts with that Gift-type driving bass, with electronic flourishes throughout. A great little song with nice understated guitars, and a Beatle-y/George Martin-ish string arrangement. The track finishes as another instrumental drone/meditation piece. And then just stops.
'Be Happy Children' - Again, memories of The Style Council are rife within this track. A strong track to finish. In anyone elses hand, this track would probably be seen as a wishy-washy over sentimental barrage. But it works snuck on the end of this album, and it works as a stand alone listen. A paean to fathers and fatherhood, and on suspects a tribute to his own father. The sentiment of the lyric cannot be argued with. After all, the title of the track only states what every dad wants for theit kids.
The Horrible Comparative Part of The Review: How many different influences exist on this album?
Style Council - particularly the expirimental jazzy/funky bits
Gift-era Jam
David Bowie
Blur
Krautrock
a touch of Talk Talk piano ('Dragonfly')
theres even a Fratellis-sounding riff in there somewhere ('Kling I Klang')
On the whole, despite Paul Weller being 53, you wouldn't believe it. This album sounds as fresh, vital and inventive as anything else I've recently purchased.
Avoiding the cliche of star ratings, or marks out of 10, I will offer that this album is ranked very near the top of any selected scale.
Is it as good as 'As Is Now' (my personal favouritte)? Not yet, but I'm sure I'll still being regularly listening to it in the future (by way of comparison, I haven't listened to '22 Dreams' for a good couple of years now)
* The album is 43mins 30seconds. This is the correct length to fit on one side of a C90 Cassette, and therefore the correct length for any album to be - well done Mr Weller
Barriers, blockers, stuff in the way, too much hassle going on, unable to finish anything properly, unwilling to start anything new, a sort of anti-Midas touch going on (everything I touch turns to ...)
(John Wesley Harding - I'm Wrong About Everything)
Oh well, in the words of Howard Jones: Things Can Only Get Better
